All for love

Mumbai is a city that never sleeps. And, according to the papers, it has no place to sleep in. or sleep around in, as the case may be. There is, reports say, a severe shortage of anywhere to have that loving feeling, nowhere to do a canoodle or three, no space for a cuddle and smooch. Over the past few days, the morality cops have been clamping down on loving couples hanging around promenades, gardens and malls, picking them up and taking them to the police station for their crimes – which are nothing more than simple demonstrations of affection. Parents and lovers alike have been protesting, balancing the wave of criticism and carping that has been echoing through parts if the city.

There is nothing wrong with a little love, even if it happens to be in the wrong places. But sometimes the wonderfully warm and fuzzy feeling that needs urgent expression gets a little too heated, and broad daylight in a public space is admittedly hardly the place to express it. Sitting on the parapet of a sea wall and indulging in a serious make-out session can be dangerous – apart from the possibility of falling into the water, you could also fall into the ambit of a photographer’s lens and be seen in living colour by half the country as you get into a passionate clinch with your significant other. Which means that all your friends and family and assorted other associates could be witness to your demonstrations of TLC, which you may not really want to happen, depending on what you consider to be ‘private’ and ‘personal’, rather than the public screening of a semi-porn video.

So where do lovers go in Mumbai? Stories have been written on this matter for years now – in fact, I wrote one, too, many years ago, when the morality brigade first made its presence felt in the Mumbai that I knew as a ‘journalist’. I have seen couples being rather overly friendly on Marine Drive, one of the more scenic main roads in the city, and tch tch-ed at their plight. I have watched passionate pairs – with a certain sympathetic detachment, of course – dodging vigilant policemen in public parks. And I have heard about people getting caught in ‘the act’, as it were, in the conference room or elevator of the newspaper office I once worked in. Perhaps the most innovative of these amorous adventures came when a duo was doing ‘it’ on the terrace of our (I was a denizen then) heritage building and was seen - though I presume they did not know it – by the entire staff of the municipal corporation from the building next door; lunchtime entertainment for the masses, just what the makers of ‘family’ films would be delighted with, no?

A lot of young couples have nowhere to go, admittedly, for a little slap and tickle. So public places are their only recourse. But couldn’t they use a little discretion when they get there and get down to whatever they are doing? Or is this going to be the new behaviour to show off the liberalisation of a modern generation?